What to do for the best

Knowing what to do for the best is one of the hardest things to do with anxiety and sticking with what you know is the easy options. This last year has taught me that this isn’t always for the best. Knowing when to be brave and make a change is one of the scariest things to do and can bring some of the greatest rewards.

After finishing my first year at university, I was forced to take a year out due to illness and my anxiety. This was the worst year of my life so far (no understatement- I don’t like to say this verbally to people I know because you don’t know what everyone else is going through, but it really was horrible) and realised that sticking with what you know is maybe not always for the best. I had a great time at sixth form with my high school best friend and we met other people too, but going to university near home had not worked out. This was when I decided to take the plunge and try change.

My psychologist and doctor suggested I try an antidepressant for my anxiety and  low mood that had developed due to my awful year. BIGGEST MISTAKE EVER. I had an awful reaction and ended up in A+E with crippling levels of anxiety. I’m not going to name the medication as it really does work for people, it just didn’t suit me. This didn’t exactly convince me change was a great thing, as it took me until my third antidepressant to find one that suited me.

Then I had the greatest reminder change is not always bad. I changed universities and I have never been so happy with a decision in my life. The support I receive at my new uni is amazing. The staff are helpful and I have both friends new and old nearby who I can talk to and rely on.

The point of this post is really to say, hindsight is brilliant- I could have gone to my new uni at first, but then I wouldn’t have found my new friends, or I could have not taken the first antidepressant, but then I may have got more depressed for not taking anything. Basically, noone knows what to do for the best, but don’t be afraid of change because it can bring about some great experiences and opportunities you would never have otherwise.

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